Two Words For Ya

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Ashlee
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Two Words For Ya

Post by Ashlee »

Edge: I just don’t understand how they’re good guys! Someone explain it to me.

The camera picked up the familiar voice of The Rated R Superstar, and the viewer went with it as meandered the hallways, coming upon Rated RKO as Randy tried to answer Edge’s quandary.

Randy Orton: They say they are, so they are. Doesn’t matter what they do. And the crowd is cheering so…

Edge: You just described us! Except, we don’t say we’re good guys!

Randy Orton: The people like what they like. What’re we going to do about it?

Edge: What’re we… what’re we… well we’re going to beat Kane and Maven and then they can hear what a huge pop actually sounds like, rather than that polite applause they’re always… Drew, are you serious?

Edge had looked over his shoulder to find EBWF’s senior most cameraman. Randy turned now looking down the barrel of the lens.

Randy Orton: Drew’s back for another exclusive. Fine, Drew. Fine. We were just talking the Coalition. Whom, as you probably know, we’re facing tonight for the EBWF Tag Team Championships.

Edge: And this match is apparently not happening at Summerslam because Randy has it in his contract that he can’t be double booked on a pay-per-view.

Randy Orton: That is not true, and…

Edge: Oh, is it not true? It’s not true? Could have fooled me because I’m defending my championship on Warfare once again!

Randy Orton: Kinda…. gettin’ me talked in to a double booking here, buddy.

Edge: No, I’m not! I’m not suggesting that at all. Why can’t the World Championship be defended on Warfare?

Randy Orton: That’s a fair point. It is Rey Mysterio.

Edge: It is! And you said very kind things about Rey Mysterio, and what did he do? He disrespected you just like everyone else around here. Rey has shown his true colors in recent months, and made it even more apparent when he attacked the Miz a couple of weeks ago. You’ve faced a thousand guys like Rey before, and in just two weeks, you’re going to retain the EBWF World Championship against the world’s greatest luchador. And tonight, tonight! We’re going to retain our championships, and you will remain Randy Champ Champ.

Edge tapped each of Randy’s shoulders where his title belts would normally be sitting. Randy shook his head.

Edge: Yeah, Randy Champ Champ didn’t really work did it?

Randy shook his head again.

Edge: I’ll think of something.

Randy Orton: Please don’t.

Randy turned his attention to the camera.

Randy Orton: You see, Drew. What Edge and I don’t understand… what we haven’t understood for weeks if we’re being honest, is who exactly is running this place. Maybe it’s an unpopular opinion, because If you were to believe the internet, EBWF is on top. EBWF is the best it’s ever been, and with me as World Champion that’s kind of hard to argue against. Who’s in charge here though?

Edge’s head swiveled around as he pretended to look for someone.

Randy Orton: Because if you ask us, Drew, it kind of seems like the students are running the classroom. We’ve been here a long time. God knows our opponents like to remind us of that all the time, but it feels like in recent months EBWF has changed a little bit.

Edge: How so, Randy?

Randy Orton: I’m glad you asked, Edge. Kane, Maven, you ought to be really glad you’re in EBWF when you are. Because 2021 is a whole different landscape than even four or five years ago. Four or five years ago, you wouldn’t have even been able to sniff these titles, because back then you would have actually had to earn a shot at these championships. But since we’re left to wonder who’s making the matches around here, it seems that people are able to just say they want a match.

Edge: Then, next thing you know, they have themselves that match. But the thing of it is, Randy, it doesn’t seem to be just any people who are able to say they want a match and they get that match. It seems to be particularly rampant within the Coalition.

Randy Orton: You’re not wrong. It’s how Christian got his Breakout Championship. It’s how Alexa got the match with Trish Stratus at Summerslam, and it’s how Maven and Kane got this match against us tonight. And I hate to break it to your unlikely little group, but you’re going to go 1 for 3 on that deal. We’re not losing tonight, and we sincerely doubt Alexa can beat Trish Stratus these days. Having to face Kane and Maven tonight, in the face of preparing for Summerslam and being stalked by a lunatic is kind of a waste of our time.

Edge: Where have Two Face and The Penguin been anyway?

Randy Orton: Wait, which one is The Penguin?

Edge chuckled.

Edge: Nice.

Randy Orton: What we can’t figure out is why the two of you requested this match anyway. The only thing we can figure is that you like getting your ass kicked. Maybe you don’t want to be there to support your team at Summerslam. Maybe you want to ensure you’ll never get another opportunity at the EBWF Tag Team Championship again. And since we don’t know what your goal is here, we’re just going to make sure we accomplish all three.

Edge: No one is ever going to accuse the two of you of being very bright, are they fellas? You align yourself with a nothing burger of a group. You team together in a team no one understands. And you challenge two of the most decorated EBWF Superstars of all time, and for what? So you can say you did? So you can fail? You’re imposing. You’re sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong. We are busy, and you want to take advantage of that. You’re in the way of our business, and we have no choice but to make sure you don’t make that mistake again.

Randy Orton: Tonight the two of you will hear the same words that have hurt so many men’s pride and ended so many teams’ dreams.

Edge: Tell ‘em.

Randy smirked.

Randy Orton: And still…

Edge chuckled and slapped Randy on the back, as they turned from Drew’s camera and walked off down the hallway before the scene faded to black.
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