Lionhearts and Tigerbears (oh my!)

[Ben M]

He claimed to be a vessel.
He claimed to be broken.
He claimed to be woken.
He claimed to have been a king on every continent.
He claimed to have travelled through time.
He reminded Chris Jericho of another intrepid traveller...

Wednesday, June 13th, 2018 – Helsinki, Finland

Almost nine years had passed since Paul London had killed the tigerbear with the sword of Richie Cunningham, thus altering the course of history. Having saved humanity, London had since opted for a life of relative tranquillity, and taken up residence in Helsinki – the very city where the demonic tigerbear had been slain.

In the time Chris Jericho had known Paul London, he had always been sceptical about London's claims to have travelled through time. Given that London had only begun claiming to have this ability after suffering a concussion, and the fact that he was known for smoking certain substances that would constitute a wellness violation, Jericho was fairly sure it was all in London's imagination. However, London made the claims with such conviction, Jericho couldn't help but wonder if he was telling the truth. If nothing else, Jericho felt that speaking to someone as eccentric as Paul London would give him an insight into the mindset of his crazy King of the Ring quarter final opponent, Matt Hardy. And so, Jericho had tracked Paul London down. He was surprised to find out that London was now living in Helsinki, Finland, but nonetheless he had arranged to fly out and meet his former Fed Ex ally.

Paul London felt there was some irony in the fact that he now lived in a literal ivory tower. He hadn't wanted to seek residence in such lavish surroundings – a small, one-bedroom apartment would have been fine - but the people of Helsinki were so grateful to him for saving them from the tigerbear that when Paul enquired about moving there, the Finnish government had spared no expense on accommodating him. Paul couldn’t help but wonder if this was “hush money”, as for obvious reasons, the Finnish government didn’t want him talking about the tigerbear. He could only imagine the political crisis that would ensue if the world knew that the zookeepers at Zoo Zoo Kachoo had allowed a tiger and a bear to breed, and in doing so threatened the very existence of the human race. Not that Paul minded keeping quiet about the events that took place on August 16th, 2009, of course. When he had first slain the tigerbear, he wanted the whole world to know, but he had long since realised that people were better off not knowing the truth. Besides, as Jack Nicholson once said, people can’t handle the truth.

As Jericho ascended the tower where Paul London now resided, he wondered how London could afford to live here. Perhaps it was simply that the cost of living was cheaper in Finland. “Or maybe he’s rich because he’s a time traveller”, he thought to himself. Jericho laughed at the ridiculousness of that thought, then entered the elevator and pressed the button for the 17th floor, where he was told Paul London was now living.

Paul had long known that his old friend, Chris Jericho, would visit him on June 13th 2018, and he had been looking forward to it. Living in an ivory tower in Helsinki can be quite lonely, especially when you don’t speak Finnish. Although Paul was initially surprised that the first member of Fed Ex to visit him was Chris, having had many years to think about it, he realised it made sense. After all, Chris was the only one of the four Fed Ex members still wrestling in EBWF, where Fed Ex had been such a dominant force. Lance Storm had retired, and notoriously hated people. Brian Kendrick was now wrestling elsewhere, and seemed content to leave both Paul and EBWF in his past. Besides, Chris Jericho’s visit had a purpose. Chris was on a mission to become King of the Ring for the first time in seven years, and needed Paul’s guidance. The elevator which granted access to Paul’s living quarters pinged, and smiling, Paul walked over to embrace Chris.

As the elevator doors opened, Jericho saw Paul London walking towards him, smiling. There was something off putting about London’s smile, and as Paul hugged him, Jericho wondered whether coming to Helsinki had been a mistake.

Paul London: How lovely to see you, Chris! It’s been too long. Please, have a seat.

Jericho looked around the open space where London lived, and could only see one seat.

Chris Jericho: It’s okay, I’ll stand. This won’t take long.

Paul London: Please, I insist. You’re my guest. Besides, I’ve done a lot of research into the human body, and I’m all too aware of the health risks it poses if a man your age stands for too long. I wouldn’t want that on my conscience.

Jericho frowned at the age comment, but took the seat. London then sat on the floor, and looked up at Jericho, smiling.

Paul London: This is lovely.

Chris Jericho: So Paul, you’re probably wondering why I’m here…

London shook his head, then interrupted.

Paul London: No, Chris. I know why you’re here. You wish to talk to me about Matt Hardy.

Jericho seemed surprised.

Chris Jericho: How did you know? Have you been keeping up to date with EBWF?

London smiled.

Paul London: You forget Chris, your future is my past. I don’t need to “keep up to date” with EBWF, and even if I wanted to, I don’t have a TV or the internet here.

Chris Jericho: No TV? No internet? What do you do all day?

Paul London: Close my eyes, remember the past, and think about the future. You’d be amazed how quickly time can pass when you have a memory as vivid as mine.

Jericho noticed what appeared to be a half rolled cigarette on the floor, and smirked.

Chris Jericho: I guess there are other ways to help pass the time.

Paul London: That’s to help me relax. It can be pretty draining, you know, having a mind like mine. Speaking of which, I know what you want to ask. Is Matt Hardy the vessel he claims to be? Has he really walked with the likes of Gengis Khan and Mahatma Gandhi? You already know the answer to this question.

Chris Jericho: He’s full of shit?

Paul London: I mean, you could have put it more eloquently than that, but sure. I know of no other time travellers, and as a general rule of thumb time travel is forbidden. I was granted an exemption to stop the tigerbear. Matt is right about one thing - he is broken - but his “condition” is temporary. In fact, in 2022 he runs for Senator in North Carolina, and tries to have all footage of him as the “Broken/Woken Warrior” deleted. That’s why he keeps chanting delete; he knows that one day, he’ll look back at his actions with embarrassment, and that they will inhibit his chances of becoming Senator. Not that he ever really had a chance.

Chris Jericho: And what about King of the Ring. Does he stand a chance in that?

Paul London: Ah, Chris. You’re asking about Matt’s future, but I can tell that really you’re asking about your own. Alas, I cannot tell you anything about the future. To do so would risk altering it.

“Or maybe you can’t tell me anything about the future because you don’t actually know anything about the future”, Jericho thought to himself. He was beginning to think the time and money he’d spent travelling to Helsinki was a waste. All the visit had confirmed so far was that Paul London was just as strange as Matt Hardy, if not stranger.

Chris Jericho: Okay, thanks Paul. Listen…

London help up his hand to stop Jericho from speaking.

Paul London: You don’t need to explain yourself, Chris. I know you need to return to the USA. Thank you for coming all this way, I do appreciate it. And I wish you luck in your quest.

Chris Jericho: But if you already know what happens, do I really need luck?

London smiled knowingly.

Paul London: Everyone needs a bit of luck every once in a while, Chris. But if I learned one thing from defeating the tigerbear, it’s that the future is not set in stone. It can be changed. In other words, you can make your own future. So good luck.

In spite of everything, those words stuck with Jericho as he headed back to America. “You can make your own future”.

----------

Monday, June 18th, 2018 – Des Moines, Iowa

Backstage at the Wells Fargo Arena, Jericho was looking at the King of the Ring brackets, which had been projected onto a screen. The bracket listed the final eight competitors, and their route to the final. As the camera zoomed in on him, Jericho turned to face the camera and began to speak.

Chris Jericho: Just three victories now stand between me and reclaiming my throne. After last week, everyone is talking about Aiden English being the first superstar to pin Braun Strowman, and I'm sure people are hoping for another upset tonight. After all, everyone loves an underdog don't they? And clearly, Matt Hardy beating me would be the biggest upset of all. But if you're rooting for Matt Hardy, I've got some bad news for you... it's not going to happen. Matt Hardy and I are both accomplished wrestlers, but the difference is, most of my accomplishments were as a singles competitor. Despite his best efforts, Matt is still best known for being the lesser half of the Hardy Boyz. He's trying to desperately to step out of his brother's shadow. He no longer refers to Jeff by name, instead simply referring to him as "Brother Nero". He proclaims to be a Broken, Woken Warrior, and makes out that he is a vessel for a higher being. But I see you for what you really are, Matt – a pretender. You're pretending to be this vessel, and you're pretending to be relevant as an EBWF superstar. You're pretending you have a chance of winning the King of the Ring, when in reality your time in the tournament will end tonight. So go back to Senor Benjamin, Matt. Go back to watching cartoons with your soon. In the Hardy Compound, you can feel like someone special. You can be the king of your own throne. But King of the Ring? Not happening. I'll make sure of it. Because I am tired of waiting on the sidelines, being told I am no longer relevant. When I became the first ever ten-time EBWF World Champion, I proved that I am what I say I am – the best in the world at what I do. It seems people have forgotten that, and they need a reminder. I'm already looking past you, Matt; I'm thinking about who I might face in the semi-final and the final. And there are some threats in this tournament – Aiden English, Tommy End, Edge, Finn Balor to name a few. They're people I'm wary off, whereas you Matt... the only person you're a danger to is yourself. A friend recently told me that I can make my own future, and that's what I'm going to do tonight. I am the future King, and the first step is DELETING Matt Hardy from this tournament.

Jericho grinned confidently into the camera as the scene faded.

[Ben M]

OOC: So a bit of context for those of you who haven't been around in EBWF for as long as I have (that's all of you except Ashlee... damn!) Back in 2009, I was part of a stable called Fed Ex with Jay (Lance Storm) and Richie (Brian Kendrick and Paul London). Richie is still one of the funniest writers I've ever worked with, and one RP that sticks out fondly is the one where he had Paul London defeat the "tigerbear" - a tiger/bear hybrid, in case you hadn't guessed! Anyway, when reading Brian's Matt Hardy RPs, it reminded me of Richie's Paul London character, so I went on a little nostalgia trip. Hopefully you enjoyed reading it!

Also, best of luck to Brian. May the best man win :)

[Sam]

This made me smile alot.

Love this.