Dynastic quality coffee beans from the Caribbean

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TheDynasty
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Joined: Thu Nov 18, 2021 3:27 pm

Dynastic quality coffee beans from the Caribbean

Post by TheDynasty »

In the backstage area, Alex Marvez knocks on a door labelled “The Dynasty,” before waiting patiently beside it. After receiving no response, he knocks again a little harder. From behind him he hears a familiar voice.

“Whoa, calm down Buddy, we don’t want you knocking our door down with those huge muscles of yours.”

He turns to see Maxwell Jacob Friedman and Richard Holliday walking towards their locker room, holding “Dynastic Coffee” mugs. Both are dressed in impeccably cut suits, with MJF’s trademark Burberry scarf over his shoulders.

Alex: “I was hoping that I could get an interview with you about your match with Austin at the Pay-Per-View. You see, you said that you weren’t medically cleared, but then we saw you discarding your sling and running to…”

Richard: “Let me just stop you there Marvez, before either my lawyer slash father slaps you with a defamation suit, or Max here just slaps the taste of your mouth. Max couldn’t compete at the Pay-Per-View because he WAS injured. We produced a doctor’s note notarised by my lawyer slash father as proof of the injury.”

Alex: “It still seems a bit suspicious, and I know that Stone Cold thinks the same.”

MJF: “Alex, Alex, Alex. Pal. Buddy. Don’t you worry your pretty-large head about what Austin thinks. Austin has never been known as much of a thinker, and there’s a very good reason for that. Some of us are born with intelligence, some of us are born with great in-ring ability. I was born with both, Austin was born…well, he was just born. Might some people say that my injury was, air quotes, convenient, or air quotes, suspicious? I guess they could see it that way, but I was, and still am, genuinely injured Marvez.”

Alex: “Can I ask what injury you’re claiming to have today?”

MJF: “The same injury, Marvez. I dislocated my shoulder when I was bangin’ your mom last week.”

“Max, Hey Max!”

MJF turns around to see KC Navarro, with a bandage on his forehead, storming towards him.

KC: “What the hell was that? I only just got discharged this morning! You didn’t say anything about Austin, and you especially didn’t mention barbed wire!”

MJF turns to Alex Marvez.

MJF: “Would you excuse us? Hey KC, buddy, let’s talk about this away from the cameras, okay?”

He puts his arm around KC and guides him into the Dynasty locker room, leaving Richard Holliday with Alex.

Alex: “Well, I guess I can interview you about your upcoming match against Stone Cold at Warfare: Final Resolution.”

Richard: “You should really have started with that Marvez. You’ve got me, the most marketable man in all professional wrestling, just standing here while you question the integrity of my friend Max. That’s such an imbecilic move that I can’t even believe that an announcer other than Michael Cole would do it. Yes, I will be facing Stone Cold at Final Resolution, and although Christmas is now in the past, I’m still going to give Steve a gift, and that gift is the chance to be in the ring with me. Just being within my aura will make Steve Austin 37.6% more marketable. Lord knows, he needs it. That man has not sold a t-shirt in over a decade, hell, I’m not even convinced that he’s washed a t-shirt in over a decade. But don’t worry Alex, don’t worry Steve, I am a marketing god, and I will help to resurrect your failing career because that’s how nice a guy I am. This is why I am the premier babyface of the EBWF. You can ask anybody, they love me here because of my kindness and generosity.”

Alex: “I’m sure you’re very kind and generous, but…”

Richard: “Oh, I am Alex. Look, I got you a late present too...”

He hands Marvez his half-drank mug of Dynastic Coffee.

Richard: “…your very own Dynastic Coffee mug. From the first print run. These are collectors’ items of the future. And that blend? I chose it myself. The finest dynastic-quality coffee beans from Guatemala. It’s a way for you average people to experience breathing the rarefied air that The Dynasty are accustomed to.”

A loud crashing sound is heard from inside the locker room.

Alex: “What was that?”

Richard: “What was what?”

Alex: “There was a crash from inside the room.”

While Alex was saying his last line, Holliday took his air pods from his pocket and inserted them into his ears.

Richard: “Sorry Alex, I didn’t hear you. I’ve gotta take this call…Hello? Birds, brownies, octopus. Total eclipse of the heart. Table…Sorry Alex, this is a very important call, I’ll have to take it in private…Water bottle, flying, cheese.”

Richard carefully opens the door far enough to slide himself inside without letting the camera see past him, before closing the door behind himself.
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