Beat the Bully

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Ben M
Posts: 1125
Joined: Sun Feb 26, 2012 2:12 pm
Location: UK

Beat the Bully

Post by Ben M »

It was Monday, June 5th, and Chris Jericho was back in Canada. Vancouver was a long way from Winnipeg, where Jericho had grown up – over 1,400 miles, or 2,300 km to use the metric system Canada preferred for measuring distance – but being back in the Great White North always felt like coming home. So it was fitting that Jericho would not just be wrestling on EBWF Warfare that evening, but also main eventing the show. At stake was a place in the Quarter Finals of the King of the Ring tournament, and standing in Jericho’s way was a man who had been wrestling almost as long as he had... Mark LoMonaco, best known by the name Bubba Ray Dudley, but more recently going by the moniker of Bully Ray.

Jericho and Bully Ray had taken very different paths in the First Round of the King of the Ring tournament. To advance to the Second Round, Jericho needed to beat Matt Riddle, and the former MMA fighter had taken Jericho to his limit. To beat Riddle, Jericho had to use the Lion Tamer, an alternate version of the Walls of Jericho that he used very rarely. Wanting to acknowledge how well his opponent had done, Jericho had shaken Riddle’s hand after the match, and let Riddle know how had he had found it to get the victory. Bully Ray, on the other hand, had been drawn against his long-time friend and tag team partner, D-Von Dudley. A man Bully Ray had betrayed recently to join the dWo. Bully Ray had been so brutal in his match against D-Von that the referee had been forced to stop the match. Jericho was sure Bully Ray would try something similar in their match, but there was no way he was going to let the New Yorker ruin his Canadian homecoming.

Warfare was due to start in less than an hour, and the sold-out Rogers Arena was already pretty full. Jericho wanted to talk about his match, but he didn’t want to request an interview or film something backstage. He wanted to be out there in the ring, standing in front of his people. So he found a member of production crew and requested that they play his music. “Judas” by Fozzy began to blast through the arena, and the crowd cheered as Chris Jericho walked out onto the stage, carrying a microphone with him. Jericho walked down the ramp and entered the ring. As Judas reached the chorus, Jericho looked around the arena and smiled. Almost every single person in the crowd was singing along. Of course, that happened in most arenas these days... whatever you think of Fozzy and Jericho’s musical talents, there was no denying that Judas is catchy af. But still, in Canada, it meant more. Jericho signalled for his music to be cut, and began to speak.

Chris Jericho: Vancouver... welcome to EBWF is Jericho! It has been far too long since I was last here, and while I may be from Winnipeg, I’ve gotta say it’s good to be back here. I love Vancouver; in fact, I made a visit to Stanley Park before travelling to the arena.

The crowd cheered. It was a cheap pop, but they didn’t care and neither did Jericho. He was grinning from ear to ear.

Chris Jericho: Now later on tonight, Your Saviour and Entertainer will be competing, right here, in this very ring. And I will be going one on one with the meanest, toughest, hardest man in all of prof-

Jericho stopped speaking and burst out laughing.

Chris Jericho: I’m sorry, Vancouver. I couldn’t stop myself from laughing, because I was about to say something that sounded so ridiculous, I know you would’ve all laughed at me. My opponent tonight is Bully Ray, or as you probably know him, Bubba Ray Dudley. Or the fat Dudley, if you’d prefer. Now Bully Ray is mean, sure. Tough? Probably. But as much as he might think he is the toughest, hardest man on the EBWF roster, he isn’t even close. Hell, I bet most of the people in this arena would be able to put up a good fight against Bully Ray! Don’t get me wrong Vancouver, I’m not going to be complacent when I step into the ring with Bully Ray later. I wouldn’t want to let all of you down, and have you leave this arena feeling disappointed. I’d be bitterly disappointed too if my chances of being the 2023 King of the Ring were ended by a man like Bully Ray... it would be too painful for me to bear, and I’d probably have to retire out of sheer embarrassment. So I promise each and every one of you, I will leave it all in this ring tonight. I’ll give you a main event that will have you on the edge of your seats, and I’ll carry Bully Ray to what will probably be the best match of his career. Not only that, I’ll give Bully Ray a beating that will make what he did to D-Von Dudley a few weeks ago look like a pillow fight in comparison.

That comment got an “oooh” from the crowd, which seemed to amuse Jericho. He paused for a moment, then continued speaking.

Chris Jericho: Now Vancouver, right now I’d like to address Bully Ray directly... or as I like to call him, Big Bubba. Big Bubba, you gave yourself the nickname Bully Ray, didn’t you? How cute. Imagine being so desperate for attention, that it’s not enough for you to make a reputation for yourself as a bully... instead, you have to make “Bully” your first name. It’s sad, really. Instead of making me fear you, Bubba, it actually makes me pity you. What’s the matter, Bubba? Did your parents not hug you enough as a child? Clearly something has gone wrong in your life, because a few months ago you turned your back on a man that was like a brother to you. And I don’t think you ever really explained why; maybe you did and I just wasn’t paying attention. It seemed to be your way of breaking out of The Coalition, or whatever it was Christian Cage called his group of misfits before you all disbanded. And I could understand, maybe even respect that, if you had decided to forge your own path after bringing a violent end to over 25 years of the Dudley Boyz. But instead, when you betrayed D-Von, you went right into the arms of Maxwell Jacob Friedman, a man so cocky he makes me look humble. Did he offer to be your little spoon, Bubba? Give you the hugs that mommy and daddy deprived you of as a child? Or did he offer you something else? Whatever it was, Bubba, I hope it was worth it, because now you’re just another one of MJF’s lackeys. You’ve basically just given up on whatever fleeting chance there was you might achieve success on your own, because as long as you’re part of the Dynas-Dick World Order, all you’ll be doing is trying to help MJF achieve the success he thinks he deserves. If you somehow pull off the upset of the century and beat me, Bubba, your dreams of winning this tournament will be short-lived. Because at some point, you’ll come across MJF, and he’ll ask you to lay down for him. You’re fighting for a leader that’s half your age, Bubba. You shouldn’t be calling yourself Bully Ray, you should be calling yourself Mid Life Crisis Ray. Honestly, it would have been more respectable to just buy yourself a sports car, or get a hair transplant.

The crowd started chanting “Mid Life Crisis”, and Jericho smiled as he imagined Bully Ray losing his shit backstage at that chant. He waited for the chant to die down, then resumed speaking.

Chris Jericho: The part that makes me saddest about all this, Bubba, is that I actually did respect you. The Dudley Boyz are one of the most successful tag teams in pro wrestling history, there’s no denying this. You will forever be associated with tables, and going “extreme”. And like I said before, I could totally understand you not wanting to be a Dudley Boy any more, if you were trying to be your own man. But being MJF’s bitch just doesn’t make sense to me... I’m not even sure he really considers you part of his faction. You weren’t involved when he made his big return, were you? Face it, Bubba, MJF will only keep you around as long as he thinks you’re useful. As soon as you’ve outlived your use to him, he will drop you. So if I were you, I’d walk away on your own terms, and restore some of your dignity. Your career is in its twilight years, Bubba, we both know that. So don’t waste the time you’ve got left taking a back seat. Here’s my challenge to you tonight, Bubba. When you step into the ring with me, forget about dWo, and forget about D-Von too. When that bell rings, I want you to focus on two people, and two people only. The first person I want you to focus on is you. Be Bully Ray, Bubba Ray, or even just Mark for all I care. Be whoever you want to be, but be fighting for yourself, not for anyone else. Fight for that crown, and the shot at the World Championship you will earn if you become King of the Ring. And the second person I want you to focus on, Bubba, in case it isn’t obvious, is me. Because here’s what I forgot to mention when I was giving you shit for calling yourself a bully. I’ve been dealing with bullies my whole life, Bubba. I have never been afraid to stand up to a bully, and while I might have gotten my nose bloodied several times, I’ve left my mark on every single bully I’ve stood up to. So if you want our match tonight to be more of a fight than a wrestling match, that’s fine by me. I’m always ready for a fight. I’m adaptable; I proved that when I beat Matt Riddle. So whatever plans and strategies you’ve got in mind, Bubba... I’ll be one step ahead. And when I’m done with you, you will never... eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeever... be the same, again!

The crowd went nuts for Jericho using one of his old catchphrases, and as Jericho dropped the microphone, the crowd began chanting “Y2J!” Jericho rolled out of the ring and made his way up the ramp, and before walking back through the curtain he held out his arms, doing his old “Break the Walls Down” pose. While Jericho had no plans to go back to being “Y2J”, he’d enjoyed giving the fans a bit of nostalgia... and against another old timer like Bully Ray, it seemed fitting.
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